Eating Late

All night dinners attract a certain clientèle: not sure why this is surprising.

If you decide to dine after midnight, while grading of course, you will enter a world of enigmatic absurdities, which may remind the teacher in you why get up every morning: I refuse to allow my kids to become one of “THEM.”

Pearls of nightwalker wisdom:

* Co-dependance is an example of people needing to pop a pill to solve their problems.

* Your intelligence is indirectly inversely proportional to the number of times you can say ‘fuck’ loudly in mixed company.

* If you don’t watch your bacon, it might be gone. Real bacon. Pig bacon. There is no metaphor.

* This sentence is acceptable: “Your head looks like a big tit. What would you do if I kissed you right now?”

* No matter how old/young you are, everyone is a potential date.

* No matter how fat you are, the motorized Big Bird ride will accommodate you.

* No matter how pink you are, your neck could be red-er.

It’s almost 1am. So I had to get out. 2 1/2 hours was enough.

I’m sure I’ll be a regular customer.

Comments

3 Responses to “Eating Late”

  1. Jolene on September 14th, 2007 7:06 am

    You need a wife. I know this really cute girl who has a thing for black men …

  2. MEH on September 14th, 2007 11:34 pm

    My girlfriend might have a problem with that. She’s the jealous type.

  3. GreyParty » New lessons from the Diner: on October 4th, 2007 12:40 am

    […] For the last dinner lessons, click here.   […]

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